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Skinny Scott Dropped Another Rose

SKINNY SCOTT, should have been a florist, “He loved to drop a rose.”

For over 20 year we employed PGA golf professionals at our golf resort.  Skinny Scott rated the top, even though his practical jokes sometimes went a little too far!  Scott was from the Iron Range in northern Minnesota where men are men and they love to play jokes – though some may seem crude.

At 6’5”, Scott, with a lanky but very strong body, stood erect making him seem even taller.  He wore his, ever present, pair of Levis, like a model, who’s slacks had been custom fitted.  Women always noticed him as they entered the pro shop; many men felt a bit intimidated.  When he put that big smile on his face and said, “welcome to Mille Lacs Golf Resort, I’am Scott how can I help you today,” he had already made a new friend.

The next thing that was said by the customer, Scott made some kind of a joke of it.  Example: “We are the Smith group checking in for our 10:10 tee time.”

Scott would get a puzzled look on his face while looking at the computed and messing with the mouse, then say something like: “Could that reservation be under another name?  I don’t a….see it.  And we are full until 2:00!”  When the customer, with a pissed look on his face would open his mouth, our Scott would say with a huge snorting guffaw, that he became famous for, “got you, didn’t I?  We have your carts ready just outside and we are right on time.  Just go hit a few putts or a few range balls and report to the starter in about 15 minutes.”  The customers would laugh and joke as they paid their fees.  They knew they were going to have fun today. 

Scott loved to drink a big glass of milk with his cheese burger with fried onions.  He had that same lunch almost everyday.  Scott had a constant case of bad gas caused by his lactose intolerance.  If Scott were an actor he would have been perfect for the camp fire farting scene in the movie Blazing Saddles.  With his size, he could have starred as the Sasquatch in the Jack Links Beef Jerkey fart on the fire commercial.  When Scott needed to relieve his ever present gas pains he referred to it as, “dropping a rose.”

Scott practical joker and personally initiate each new pro shop employee the same way.  During a training session when just Scott and the trainee were in the shop he would notice a group walking up the walk toward the pro shop.  Scott would silently “drop a rose” then say to the unsuspecting trainee, “excuse me a second.”  Then retreat to the storage room to peek out and watch the action.

About the time the rose was in full bloom, the group would enter the shop.  The trainee and the golfers would catch the aroma of the rose at about the same time.  The trainee would get an embarrassed look, and the golfers would stare in a muted silence.

Scott would then enter from the back room and say as his nose twitched a little, “welcome to Mille Lacs Golf Resort, I’am Scott how can I help you today.”

Most of the time the embarrassed trainee would rapidly retreat to the back room, trying to gather their thoughts.  There was a time or two when he got called out by the trainee but he was quick enough on his feet to handle it.

Scott was a good golfer and a great employee who helped making a trip to our golf course a fun time.  He was a favorite with our very dedicated grounds crew who missed him when he left to go back to the Iron Range and make some real money.  For years they would fondly say something like, “remember when old Scottie dropped that rose on Becky in the pro shop.”

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